Not A Hero: A Bad Boy Marine Romance Read online

  Miles and Zoe both laughed at that. Zoe didn’t blame Walter one bit. Bianca was…intense.

  Walter shoveled another large bite of lasagna in his mouth and looked at them both expectantly.

  “All right, all right.” Miles gave in. “Zoe, would you like to be my date to VillageFest?”

  Zoe smiled, tapping her index finger to her lips like she was thinking about it. “Hmm.”

  “Please,” Miles added, a mischievous look in his eyes that said she’d be paying for her hesitation later. “Pretty, pretty please?”

  “Fine,” she finally conceded, trying to keep her expression as uninterested as possible. “I’ll be your buffer date on Saturday.”

  “How kind of you,” Miles replied with a laugh.

  Walter clapped his hands. “Good! I feel better now, because I wish I could go to cheer you on, but no way am I going to still have energy so late at night.” Walter sighed. “Now that that’s settled, let’s talk about dessert. I’m thinking brownies.”

  Zoe laughed and pushed up from her chair to go grab them. “I made some earlier—with the caramel you like.”

  “You’re the best nurse I’ve ever had,” Walter praised her before pointing a finger at his son. “You should say thank you to her more often, Miles. We’re lucky to have her.”

  “We definitely are,” Miles agreed, his tone lower with a hoarseness to it that made her shiver with excitement. “We definitely are.”

  18

  “I’D KNOW THAT BITE MARK ANYWHERE!” Tobin bellowed, his hands on his hips and fire in his eyes.

  “You don’t know what you’re talking about,” Bianca said, an exasperated huff pushed through her lips.

  “ON HIS NECK, BIANCA?”

  She shrugged. “Well, that is where hickeys usually are, Tobin.”

  Miles glanced sideways at Zoe, whose eyes were as wide as his. He circled an arm around her back and dropped his lips to her ears. “Maybe we should go on a ride without them,” he whispered.

  “Please,” she replied quickly.

  Hand in hand, they headed farther down the fair’s main path, each side lined with booths and food and games and vendors and prizes and rides and every other entertainment a person could possibly think of.

  “He means nothing to me, Tobin!” He could still hear Bianca pleading as Tobin stormed past them. She was close on his heels, and not giving up. “I only love you, baby!”

  Miles laughed and shook his head. “Well, looks like they beat us to it and left first.”

  “Man, you weren’t kidding!” Zoe agreed. “When they break up, it’s massive.”

  Miles draped an arm over her shoulder and pulled her closer. “Well, Tobin loves hard. He’s a good guy, but definitely picks the wrong women.”

  “She wasn’t so bad.”

  Miles gave her a you’re-crazy look, and she laughed, leaning into his side. He loved the way people looked at them as they walked around the different booths—knowing smiles and warm greetings. There was no questioning they were together, and everyone seemed to openly accept them as a couple.

  He was in a couple.

  The thought hit him hard, and a nervous feeling settled in his chest. All the reasons why he’d tried to stay away from her in the first place started inching back into his mind. Panic rose in his stomach, but he pushed it away and squeezed her tighter into his side.

  Zoe looked at him, her face covered in a huge smile. He leaned down and kissed her, soft and sweet, and she looked like she was living in a fairytale.

  And he felt the same way.

  He felt happy, and they were perfect. The thought made him sick. Happiness was the last thing he deserved. He didn’t deserve it after what he’d done. The child whose life he’d ended would never experience perfect or happy. Miles swallowed hard as he tried to push the thoughts from his head, but the guilt was pouring in as if the dam had burst.

  He couldn’t think this way. He knew he couldn’t.

  He wasn’t about to mess up a great thing with a great woman because of his own demons. Miles pushed down at his demons, attempting to lock them away where he couldn’t hear them.

  Tonight, he just wanted it to be about them, about her.

  “Let’s go on the Ferris wheel!” Zoe pointed at the sky, then grabbed his hand and pulled her along behind him.

  He followed, saying nothing as he handed their tickets to the attendant and was ushered onto the next available car. Zoe scooted closer to him on the bench, her arm resting across his lap. He stretched his across the back of the seat, around her shoulders, and she laid her head against him.

  “I have to admit,” she began as the machine churned and slowly began to move. “I’m a little afraid of heights.”

  “What?” Miles chuckled and looked down at her, finding it easier to push away his demons when looking down at her sweet face. “It was your idea to go on this ride.”

  “I know.” She shrugged, the smile she’d been sporting for the last hour of them combing through booths, enjoying carnival food, and playing silly games still on her lips. “I like to face my fears.”

  Miles didn’t respond, the knot in his stomach reminding him she deserved better only growing. He had been fearless once upon a time, but now being home, his days were mostly spent trying to forget what he’d done.

  And he didn’t feel so fearless anymore.

  “Maybe you can help distract me,” she hinted, leaning closer into him and nuzzling her nose against his cheek.

  They were higher now and coming around the top of the bend. Her knuckles were white as she held on to him, and he had to smile at how cute she looked pressed into him. Taking her cues, he turned his head to find her lips. Brushing past hers once, then twice, he planted soft kisses against her lips until she slowly parted her mouth.

  Dipping his tongue inside, he felt her body responding to him. Soft moans left her throat and her hand slid up his chest, twisting into the fabric of his shirt. His one arm was already around her back, but he circled her waist with the other arm now too, hugging her against him. They kissed for the entire first revolution, and Miles was glad they were in a car that mostly hid them from the fair goers on the ground.

  The privacy gave Miles a wicked idea.

  As the car began to climb again, he dropped one arm down to her lap, resting his hand on her knee right below the hem of her skirt. She squirmed slightly, kissing him harder as she nipped at his lips before pushing her tongue into his mouth.

  Sliding his hand over her thigh, he moved under the fabric until he found her core. She parted her legs willingly, just enough for him to touch her. Miles hoped no one in the cars above them happened to look down, or they’d certainly be seen, but no one else had a view of them.

  He dragged a finger across the fabric of her panties, excited to find them soaked. He growled into her mouth. “Fuck, Zoe, you’re so wet.”

  “I always am when I’m with you,” she whispered, her voice breathy as they reached the top of the second revolution and his dick sprang to attention. The feel of his fingers sliding inside her panties was the perfect distraction for all the self-doubt he’d been feeling moments before.

  She moaned and bucked her hips, and he slid his tongue into her mouth. Pressing against her clit, he rubbed in small circles as she trembled. The car got closer and closer to the ground, and he pulled his hand out quickly, sitting up straight.

  They both stared straight ahead, trying not to smile too hard as their car moved around the bottom of the circle and past the attendant and they began climbing again.

  The moment they were above people’s eye level, he turned back to her and she molded her lips to his, his hand sliding back between her legs. Ripping her panties, he yanked them straight down her legs and leaned down to untangle them from her feet. He tucked the fabric into his pocket and grinned at her.

  Her eyes were wide and her cheeks red, but her smile said she was more than okay with his panty-theft. She gave him a sultry grin and spread her knees, coaxin
g him to her. He leaned back into her, kissing her and returning his hand to where it belonged.

  Two fingers slid easily into her folds as his thumb fold her clit and pushed small circles over it. He pumped his fingers in rhythm to the sway of the Ferris wheel as she gasped into his mouth.

  They reached the top again and the ride paused, rocking back and forth as it hung in the air. Miles glanced down over the edge to see them letting several more people on the cars down below. Being the highest car now, absolutely no one could see them and they were entirely hidden from view.

  Miles moved quickly, pulling Zoe onto his lap so her back was to his chest. She leaned back into him, gasping as she looked out across the land around their town. He pushed her knees apart wider, one of his hands flat on her clit in firm, steady circles, and the other hand using his fingers to push inside her again and again.

  “Look out at the world in front of us, baby,” he whispered against her ear as she panted. “We can be anything. We can go anywhere. I want you and only you, and all of this in front of us.”

  He pumped his fingers harder and she trembled.

  “Tell me you want this, Zoe. All of this. All of me.”

  He needed to hear her say this wasn’t all in his head. That she knew who he was, and who he’d been, and she still wanted him. That he was good enough to deserve her affections; he was good enough to make a woman like her want a man like him.

  “Yes,” she replied quickly, her voice shaky. “I want you. I want it all.”

  “Then take it, Zoe,” he whispered again, flicking his thumb across her swollen clit harder, his fingers curving up slightly inside her. “Come on my hands right now, in front of everyone we know, for me, and me only.”

  “Miles,” she gasped, her body shaking harder and harder as she pushed down onto his fingers. He felt her pulse around him and pumped harder. The Ferris wheel lurched forward and slowly began moving across the top just as she unraveled against him. She turned her head to the side and he found her mouth, so her moans of climax would be muffled against his lips.

  She shuddered and calmed and he picked her up off his lap, placing her on the bench beside him where she sagged weakly against the side and smoothed out her skirt. They didn’t say anything as they lowered closer and closer to the ground, but he gave her a wicked smile as he sucked his fingers into his mouth, cleaning her from his hand.

  Her eyes widened and when they got to the bottom as the ride ended, he handed two more tickets to the attendant. “I think we’ll go again.”

  19

  It was only a little after eight o’clock, and Zoe had already enjoyed the fair more than she had any other year. Multiple secret orgasms on a Ferris wheel were certainly part of that, but so was sharing the whole fair experience with someone she…cared about.

  She’d gone to the annual festival most of her childhood, but hadn’t been since she’d graduated high school. Back then, she always went with groups of friends, but there was something entirely different about playing darts or ball games or whatever other games they had here with a partner.

  Miles even won her a small stuffed bear she was proudly carrying tucked against her chest. It was corny, and silly, but she was still young and had never gotten to be silly before.

  During nursing school, she’d had almost no life. She studied all the time, and when she did finally get involved with a man, it was definitely the wrong one. Her marriage to Rusty hadn’t even been her choice, but it had happened and she had to live with that. Just like she had to live with the consequences of what happened to end their marriage.

  But Zoe didn’t want to think about any of those demons right now.

  She wanted to be happy and carefree, and with a hot guy who made her feel like she was the most beautiful woman in the world, a man who made her body split apart two hundred feet in the air where no one and everyone could have seen them, a man who’d been hardened by things she didn’t understand but was soft and gentle with her.

  A man she knew she could fall for.

  The same man who was currently on stage in front of hundreds of their fellow citizens getting a plaque for his service to the country. Tobin was up there too, but he looked kind of angry, which could have something to do with Bianca off to the side of the crowd sucking face with some man Zoe didn’t recognize.

  Now that she thought about it, Miles didn’t look too happy either. She waved and blew him a kiss, which earned a small smile and nod of his head in her direction. Her other hand was holding up her phone, recording a video of the entire award show for Walter who’d been too tired to come out tonight. She knew how badly he’d wanted to see his son on stage though, so she was excited to show him the video in the morning.

  “Go, Miles!” she hollered, cheering with the rest of the crowd as they clapped.

  Tight jeans and a giant belt buckle, his plaid shirt tucked into it, he looked like a regular cowboy, which wasn’t particularly unusual in a small town, but not the norm here either. He’d always had an outdoorsy feel to his wardrobe, probably from living in the woods on the lake, and Zoe was all for it.

  The mayor stepped to the microphone after an announcer had gone through a list of upcoming events, random things people should know, and how two different cars in the parking lot had left their lights on. “Hey Slipwick! How are you all enjoying VillageFest?”

  Cheers rang out from the crowd covering Main Street, now closed off to cars and covered with a stage and rows of booths and games instead.

  “I’m honored to acknowledge two exceptional citizens of Slipwick today,” he continued, his lips so close to the microphone Zoe almost had to plug her ears. “As high schoolers, they served the community in many fashions, including Miles’s stint as quarterback of the football team, and Tobin’s time as, uh, hmm, well, he was a student at our high school. Both men went on to serve in the Marines for the last eight years and have returned home safe and sound.”

  Zoe glanced at Tobin; his face was ever stormier than before. He was a good guy, and she’d definitely learned that about him over the last few weeks, but his reputation during high school hadn’t been great. She still found it hard to believe he and Miles had been friends for so long, because they were sheer opposites.

  “…presenting these beautifully engraved plaques for Slipwick’s Town Heroes Award, Miles Kydd and Tobin Leach!” The mayor motioned for the men to step forward.

  Miles and Tobin marched forward and stood at attention in front of the mayor. One at a time, they accepted their plaques and paused mid-handshakes to take photos for the paper.

  Zoe could see from where she stood that Miles’s smile was forced.

  When the short ceremony came to an end, Zoe waited off to the side as Miles waded through throngs of people, stopping every few feet to reply to someone saying hello or congratulations, or to take a photograph with them. By the time he got to her side, he looked worn out and angry.

  “I’ve never been happier to see you in my life,” he groaned, pulling her against his body and pressing his lips to hers.

  She smiled into their kiss and wrapped her arms around his neck, kissing back with every ounce of herself. “I’m so proud of you,” she finally said as their lips parted. “Town Hero…that’s a big deal. Let me see the plaque!”

  He broke eye contact with her, looking down as he held up the wooden square embossed on the front with the award and his name.

  “It’s beautiful, Miles,” she said, sliding her fingers across the surface. “Your dad is going to love hanging this in the house.”

  His face lightened a little. “That’s true.”

  “You know you deserve this, right?” she said, linking her arm in his as they walked away from the crowd.

  He inhaled slowly, breathing out in one long sigh. “Do you mind if we go home? I’m kind of tired.”

  “Sure.” They’d been there all day and done tons of games and rides, so she was equally tired. “I could use a little peace and quiet.”

  “Exac
tly.” He squeezed her tighter against his side and kissed the top of her head. “It’s been non-stop noise all day. My ears are ringing.”

  “Let’s get you to bed then, old man,” she teased.

  He grinned down at her, arching one brow. “As long as I’m not in bed alone.”

  She tapped her index finger to her lips like she was considering her request, which was crazy of course, because there’s nowhere else in the world she’d rather be than in his bed. “I’ll see what I can do.”

  “That’s my girl.”

  A wave of warmth and good feelings passed through her at his words as they walked together, his arm over her shoulders. Any reservations she’d once had about being with him were officially gone. She not only really liked this man, but she trusted him. There was no doubt in her mind anymore that whatever his problems were under the surface, he did care about her and he wasn’t going to hurt her.

  He was her hero, as much as he was the town’s.

  Town Hero Award. What a joke.

  Miles strolled to the end of the dock behind his house, the moonlight illuminating his path, as he thought of the award he’d just won. For doing his job—and a shitty job at that. He’d made an unthinkable mistake, and barely gotten a slap on the wrist for it.

  Child soldier, they’d determined. They’d even praised his marksmanship, and he’d gotten a medal for saving Tobin’s life and neutralizing a target.

  A fucking medal! For neutralizing a target.

  Meanwhile, a child was still dead. The little boy’s terrified face as he realized what was happening still plagued Miles’s memory. He’d woken up to sweat-stained sheets and a panic in his gut for months, with only some relief recently.

  Thanks to her.

  Something about her wrapped around him at night—it calmed him. The dreams still came, but less frequently, and much less intensely. In fact, in the last two weeks of steadily dating Zoe, he’d found a lot of his flashbacks had stopped.