Not A Hero: A Bad Boy Marine Romance Read online

  “Oh my goodness!” she gushed, standing and wrapping him in an impromptu hug. He froze for a moment, not prepared for the sudden burst of affection from a stranger. “That must be so exciting. A whole new start to your life. That’s so amazing.”

  “Thanks,” he said, faltering. He studied her expression, looking for hints of sarcasm or something negative, but there was nothing. This complete stranger was going through something much more important than his music career, yet she was genuinely ecstatic for him.

  He couldn’t help but wonder if Gina would ever be that kind of person. She helped him with his career, that was certain, but had it been because she liked him and his music. Or had it been for her own career gains. This woman acted with care for others, even others she didn’t know, yet his own girlfriend hadn’t been able to do that.

  Or maybe he just hadn’t given her the chance. He’d taken her for granted from the moment they met, and never really gotten to know who she was. He thought he had, but clearly there was more to her that he hadn’t even begun to tap. At least, he hoped that was the case, because this was the kind of person he wanted to be around. A sweet and selfless person who would stop to chat with a stranger.

  “Well, thanks again, uh...?” He realized he’d never gotten her name.

  “Caroline. I’ve got to get going. Congrats again, good luck!” With that, she walked off and turned the next corner. He watched her for a moment, enjoying the warmth in his whole body at such a positive encounter, and wondering if he’d judged Gina too quickly.

  ***

  “I really wish you boys talked to me about it before you did that.” Laura sighed and rubbed her fingers over her eyes.

  Everyone was crowded into the hospital room the following day, awaiting the results of their blood tests. Mickey was in a plastic arm chair next to her bed, holding her hand. Rock and Dylan were sitting in two folding chairs off to his left and Charlie was leaning against the wall near the door. Logan sat at the foot of the bed, rubbing his mother’s leg to help her circulation.

  “You would have just said no,” Logan retorted, shrugging his shoulders.

  “Damn right she would have said no,” Mickey grumbled and glared at his son.

  “Momma Clay, you don’t need to worry about any of us. We are not the little boys that ran around your backyard playing all day anymore,” Rock said, a softness in his voice that was very unusual.

  “Yeah, we are all smart and edu-ma-cated now,” Charlie slowly and purposefully mispronounced the word, teasing her.

  She grinned at them, tears flooding her eyes. “My boys. You may be all grown up now, and three or four times my size, but you will always be my boys.”

  Laura sighed and smiled at each one of them. Mickey rolled his eyes and grumbled something inaudible, which caused all the men to burst out laughing. Laura squeezed her husband’s hand and wrinkled her nose at him in jest.

  “Are we celebrating something in here?” A nurse smiled at them as she waltzed in and picked up the clipboard hanging at the end of Laura’s bed.

  “Oh, yes. We are always celebrating, but today is special. Today, my boys are men.” Laura smiled at her.

  “They are all your sons? Man, you must have had your hands full back in the day.” The nurse chuckled and pressed some buttons on the machine, writing down numbers on the chart. “I have one boy right now and Lord knows that is enough for me.”

  “Every single one of them.” Laura grinned back at her and all the boys nodded in agreement, smiling back.

  “Well, you have yourself a beautiful family, ma’am. Your doctor is over in the next room finishing up, so he’ll be here soon.” The nurse gave them one last smile as she exited the room.

  “We should have told her that the real celebration is Logan. Soon, we can all say that we know a celebrity!” Rock chuckled, pointing at Logan with a smirk on his face.

  Logan just rolled his eyes.

  “Hell yeah, plus we’ll have the hook up to front row tickets for the hottest shows in town!” Dylan said, looking at Logan with exaggerated seriousness.

  “Dude, it’s a record deal, but that doesn’t mean I will become famous,” Logan responded.

  “The fuck it don’t! You are going to make over seven fucking figures a year!” Rock burst into the conversation from his place by the door.

  “Hey, you watch your mouth around a lady, son!” Mickey abruptly cut in. Rock put his hands up and mouthed “I’m sorry” to Laura who was laughing.

  “Well I can tell you now, the moment I get my first check, Momma, you’re getting out of this place. The nicest place we can find, with at least six windows. With room service. And a butler,” Logan said, playing into their joke even though they all knew that he was serious.

  Laura laughed again at his comment. “I knew you could do it, Logan.”

  “We all knew he could do it. It was convincing him that was the problem,” Dylan said with a hint of sarcasm.

  “Never a doubt in my mind,” Mickey said quietly.

  The entire room went silent and looked at him. It wasn’t often that you heard a compliment from Mickey Clay and Logan was soaking in every syllable.

  “Knock, knock,” The same doctor from the other day said awkwardly standing in the door wearing the same scrubs and coat.

  “Come on in, doctor! Ignore these boys.” Laura said, smiling.

  He walked in hesitantly and looked down at his clipboard. “Well, I’ve got good news and bad news I guess, depending on how you look at it.”

  “Let’s hear it,” Logan said.

  “We tested Mickey’s blood the other day and it wasn’t a match. We tested all four of you and unfortunately, none of you were a match either.” The doctor said looking up from his chart briefly.

  “None of us?” Rock’s jaw dropped.

  “Out of all five of us men, not a single one was viable?” Charlie was incredulous.

  Logan looked silently at the doctor, his jaw rigid with tension. He felt his mother let out a quiet sigh so he reached up and squeezed her hand.

  “You said you had good news too, doctor. But so far, all I heard was a ton of shit,” Mickey said loudly, glaring at the doctor.

  Everyone turned to look at Mickey and then back at the doctor, awaiting his response.

  “Yes, there was one match and she has already signed all the paperwork, agreeing to the donation. So, we can schedule the surgery for this afternoon if you are ready, Laura,” the doctor said directly to Logan’s mother.

  The entire room was silent and everyone was looking around at one another in utter confusion.

  “You just said there wasn’t a match.” Logan furrowed his brow and tried to understand what the doctor was saying.

  “None of you five were a match, but we did have one match. A, uh-” He lifted up one of the papers on the clipboard to double check. “Gina Vile. She was a match and is being prepped now. So, we are ready to go, Mrs. Clay, if you are.”

  “What are you talking about? I don’t know who that person is,” Laura sputtered in confusion while Logan stood straight up, his face beat red.

  “Gina?” Logan was barely breathing.

  Dylan stepped forward. “Wait, Logan’s girl, Gina?”

  “Wow, I didn’t know she got tested,” Charlie said slowly.

  “You have a girlfriend, Logan?” Mickey was now standing and the entire room was firing questions back and forth in utter chaos.

  “Everyone, stop!” Logan shouted and the room fell silent.

  He looked around at everyone, while the doctor cleared his throat. “I’m just going to go. If you want to see her, she is being prepped in OR 3.”

  The doctor looked uncomfortable and backed out of the room quickly. Everyone’s eyes turned to Logan whose hands were on his forehead, trying to sort out in his head everything that he had just heard.

  “So, your girlfriend wants to donate a kidney to me? Why did we not even know you had a girlfriend?” Laura broke the silence quietly, speaking slowly.
>
  “I broke up with her in New York. She wasn’t honest about who she was, she only started dating me to convince me to take the record deal,” Logan tried to explain.

  “Well, didn’t you already want the record deal?” Charlie asked, crossing his arms over his chest.

  “Yeah, of course,” Logan replied.

  “Then, what convincing did she need to do?” Dylan asked, poking holes in his logic and making Logan think back on his time with her.

  “Did you guys only talk about the record deal? Because you were a different person around her, you seemed so happy,” Rock said, his voice low.

  “No, we never really talked about it.”

  “Why did you break up with her, son?” his father finally chimed in.

  Logan hung his head and sighed. All of the reasons he had weren’t making sense anymore, or they just didn’t seem as important.

  “Shit,” Logan muttered to himself.

  “Logan, go talk to her, baby. But for God’s sake, do not let this woman give me her kidney. I never even met her and my son has been a complete ass to her. That poor girl.” Laura smiled at him, teasing him slightly in an attempt to lighten the mood.

  Logan tried to smile back but it was forced. He headed out of the room, feeling all eyes on him.

  12

  Gina sat on the operating table that was surprisingly more narrow than she had expected. The nurse standing in front of her was explaining how the procedure would go and what would happen each step of the way, even though it was at least the third time she’d heard the spiel today. However, they told her that with a volunteer operation like hers, they had to make sure again and again she knew what she was doing.

  Although it sounded a whole lot more like they were trying to give her time to back out.

  That was definitely not going to happen, Gina thought to herself as she tucked her hospital gown a little tighter.

  She felt strange knowing soon she would be lying naked on a table for a room full of doctors and nurses and who knows who else to see her. She glanced around at several trays filled with vacuum sealed medical instruments and gulped, pushing her nerves down at the sight of the sharp scalpels.

  “Do you understand everything I have just explained?” the nurse finally asked and Gina nodded her head yes.

  “I need to hear you say that you do or do not understand, miss,” the nurse badgered her again.

  “Yes! I understand. For like the sixth time, I understand. Can we please just go ahead and get started?” Gina begged.

  They could ask a hundred times, but she wasn’t changing her mind. She knew how much Logan loved his mother and she had learned how desperately his mother needed a kidney. Logan would probably never know where it came from and she was fine with that. She knew that she had destroyed that relationship long before it even started, but that didn’t mean she didn’t want Logan to be happy. Even more so, she knew that he would give up his career to take care of his ailing mother. With a voice like his, that wasn’t something she could allow.

  His music was too important. He was too important, for both her and the world who needed him.

  “Can I have a moment alone with her, please?” a deep voice behind Gina suddenly commandeered the attention of everyone in the room.

  “Uhm, yeah, I guess we can spare a couple of minutes. Come on, folks.” The lead nurse pointed a few orderlies and nurses toward the exit and people slowly shuffled out. Gina didn’t turn around; she didn’t need to.

  She knew who was there.

  “What are you doing here?” she said softly, looking down at her bare feet dangling off the side of the table.

  “Me? Gina, what the hell are you doing here?” Logan walked around the table to stand a few feet in front of her. His muscled arms were crossed over his broad chest and his stance was wide and firm.

  “I didn’t know that you would find out. I’m sorry,” she mumbled, uncomfortable with the heaviness pushing down on her chest right now.

  She wasn’t used to this type of anguish. Being around a man she couldn’t have, but that she wanted more than anything- that was a very new. Gina always got what she wanted.

  “Why are you doing this, Gina? Do you think that I’m suddenly going to forget everything that you did and be with you because of it?” Logan narrowed his eyes as he looked down at her.

  “No! Of course not! I didn’t even know they would tell you my name. I told the nurse not to,” Gina whined slightly, pouting.

  “You’re doing this with no ulterior motive?” Logan asked again, softer this time.

  “Does it matter?” She sighed before glancing up at him, surprised to see that while his stance was domineering, his gaze wasn’t. She knew she didn’t deserve his trust and he wasn’t going to believe her, but his kind eyes gave her the slightest glimmer of hope.

  “I can’t think of anything in my life that has ever mattered more.” Logan dropped his arms to his side and looked at her incredulously, surprised she didn’t know that already.

  “What are you talking about?” She furrowed her brow as she stared at him.

  He closed the distance between them with a few small steps, pushing her legs apart as he stood against the table between them. He put his hands flat on the table on either side of her and leaned closer, only inches from her face.

  “You matter to me, Gina,” he whispered softly, causing her eyes to dart up and meet him.

  “Really?” She choked out, pushing back tears that were forcing their way through. That was definitely not what she’d expected to hear, and she wasn’t even sure she wanted to hear it.

  He leaned down and kissed the tear off her cheek, then wrapped his arm around her back and pulled her tighter against him. She hugged her legs around him, eagerly wanting to be as close to him as possible and feel him against her in every way.

  “Really, Gina,” he confirmed, kissing her jaw and whispering in her ear as he pushed her hair back over her shoulder. She smiled and buried her face in his neck, wrapping her arms around his chest as far as she could reach.

  “I love you, Logan,” she whispered, slightly muffled, into his skin.

  “I know,” he chuckled and kissed her cheek again. She pulled back to look at him, a slight grin on her tear-stained face.

  “How do you know?”

  “That look on your face,” he replied, kissing her softly on the lips.

  “What about it?” she asked, tasting him on her tongue even after he pulled away to look at her.

  “It’s the same look you gave New York,” he told her.

  She scrunched up her nose at him and stuck out her tongue defiantly, causing him to laugh loudly before descending to devour her mouth. She leaned backward, allowing him greater access as he pushed his hands inside her hospital gown and slid her forward on the table. Her breathing was ragged and his eyes were nearly dark gray at this point.

  “Logan,” she gasped as he unbuttoned the front of his pants.

  “What?” he said between the assaults on her neck now moving down her collarbone.

  “We can’t do this here! What if someone sees us?” She giggled, pressing her fingers into his warm, hard skin.

  “We’ll charge them for tickets later.” He raised his eyebrows and winked at her, pushing her hospital gown up her thighs. She laughed and leaned in closer, inhaling the perfectly musky scent of his skin.

  “But, I’m about to have surgery,” she continued to protest even though she was sounding less and less convincing with each contact of his lips ravaging her body.

  “The hell you are. You’re not doing that,” he said firmly, pulling her hips against him and finding his way to her very core. She gasped and moaned, wiggling to scoot as close to him as possible.

  “Don’t you know by now that I never do what I’m told?” she whispered into his ear seductively, kissing him again.

  “You’re going to be the death of me, woman.” Logan growled into her shoulder, biting her skin softly.

  He wouldn’t kn
ow for a few years how true his last words were.

  Epilogue

  2012

  “I heard you the first time, Gina.”

  “And yet, you’re just standing there not getting ready.” She crossed her arms over her chest and tapped her high heel against the marble floor of their New York City penthouse. Logan placed his hand against the glass, leaning against it as he looked out onto the city.

  “I have two hours. I’ll be fine. I planned on checking in on my mom first,” he said, turning around and walking past her into the bedroom to grab his cell phone.

  “You spoke to her this morning,” Gina called after him then stomped into the kitchen. “I have one kidney, too. It would be really nice if you could fucking act like I matter to you every once in a while.”

  He rolled his eyes and took a deep breath, dialing his parent’s house.

  “Hi, honey,” Laura’s voice chimed through the phone.

  “Hey, Momma. How are you feeling today?”

  “Baby, you don’t need to keep checking on me. I’m fine, perfectly healthy. That nurse you hired is so sweet, she takes good care of me. Your dad is loving his job, just having somewhere to go every day I think.”

  “I know it’s been a few years, but I always worry about you. I feel like I never get to talk to you anymore,” he sighed.

  “I know, baby. I miss you too, but I understand. I see you on the news all the time, you’re playing so many shows. I am so proud of you, honey. Plus, I’m sure you and Gina are keeping busy together.” Laura always loved to hear about his girlfriend. “How is my beautiful Gina?”

  “She is fine, she says hello,” Logan lied, pacing back and forth around the bedroom. He hated lying to his mother, but he didn’t want her to know how things really were.

  “Mom, I gotta go. I have a show tonight, need to dress and go to sound check. Give my love to Dad, okay?” Logan asked.

  “Of course, baby boy. Hey, Logan? Maybe try to come out to see us sometime soon? It’s been so long,” she asked, trying not to push.